Leadership Tip

How to give feedback when it’s not wanted

It’s important to give feedback to team members. But what should you do when an employee gets defensive? Leaders in these situations may want to take a break from giving performance-related feedback and try giving feedback based more closely on how the employee receives it. Here’s how to get started:

  • Get curious. You can’t assume that the feedback-receiver sees their behaviour in the same way that you do. Acknowledge that you’re expressing an opinion and ask to hear the other person’s, too.
     
  • Use neutral language. Try to avoid words that carry negative connotations and place blame.
     
  • Ask for feedback yourself. Be brave enough to ask, “How am I contributing to this problem?” and then model how to receive the feedback.
     
  • Secure a commitment. Make a specific request for a behaviour change, be open to counter-offers, and come to an agreement on the goal.

The above leadership tip...
was sent in response to a question from a participant on our 10/10 leadership development and mentoring programme and adapted from When Your Employee Doesn’t Take Feedback by Deborah Grayson Riegel. Whether you're a first time manager or an experienced leader, straightforward, practical advice on best practice is hard to find. Until now. To find out how you, your team or your organisation can benefit, please join us on our next complimentary webinar or contact us.

Subscribe

Free weekly email on things you didn't know last week with links to articles on leadership excellence. To view previous editions click here.


Unlock your potential

Whether face to face, or over the telephone, we can develop your leadership skills, support you in making important decisions, and help you reach your potential.

Read More

Leadership Articles

10 Ways to influence people

The ability to form mutually respectful relationships with others and to succeed in getting your ideas heard is a vital element of being a good manager.  Having influence enables you to gain support and commitment for your proposals, and... read more

10 easy ways to lose 10lbs

An extra 100 calories here and there may not sound like a big deal if you are watching your weight. Yet if over the course of one year you saved yourself this number of calories each day, you could save 36,500 in total, which equates to dropping 10lb in... read more

10 ways to motivate your team

There are many different ways to motivate your employees without throwing money at them. Treating your workforce fairly and letting them know they are valued often have a bigger impact on employee motivation than salary, as our top ten tips show... read more

Leadership Tips

How to maintain your mentoring relationship

Maintaining a strong mentoring relationship requires effort, communication, and mutual respect. By nurturing trust, accountability, and open communication, you can ensure a mentoring relationship remains productive and rewarding for both parties.... read more

How to save a failing meeting

We've all been stuck in long meetings that bounce aimlessly from one topic to the next. Instead of rolling your eyes, take control. Be brave enough to propose a solution. If a meeting starts veering off track, or feels like it's losing control, try these... read more

How to keep your to-do-list fresh

In a world of constant distractions and endless demands, keeping a to-do list is one of the simplest yet most effective ways to stay organized and productive. However, the challenge isn’t just in creating a list - it’s in keeping it fresh, relevant, and... read more